Finding an Egg’s Equinox

First day of Fall. Eighth grade, it must have been. Maybe ninth. Could be important, you never know.

Walked into homeroom to find that the science teacher had balanced dozens of eggs on the lab table at the front of the classroom. Dozens of white soldiers, standing at attention on that dark black battle field. It was unsettling, as though some new law of physics had been enacted overnight and all the rules of nature were, now, officially suspect.

But not really — no more suspect than sudden, undying love for the most gorgeous boy in the world after the most gorgeous boy in the universe sits down in the seat right in front of you. He was there, in the universe, all along. You just found out about him when he sat down in front of you. But I digress . . .

My homeroom teacher, one of two ninth grade science teachers in our school, explained that you could balance an egg on its end on the Equinox because of some relationship between the earth and the sun and the moon at just this point in the year.

My homeroom teacher taught the ninth grade science class for less-academically-motivated students. At least, that’s how I remember it. (I might be remembering wrong since I was the least academically-motivated student in history and I was in the other ninth-grade science class . . . but I digress . . . )

It’s important to understand how a person remembers things because that’s all they have to work with when they are trying to learn from their past.

What I learned that day was that I could, indeed, balance an egg on the Equinox. I did it that day, and I did it for several years after that. And not just on the Fall Equinox, but also on the Spring Equinox. Twice a year, you could balance an egg on its end. Imagine that. Don’t just imagine it; do it. Do it yourself. Nothing special about me. Anyone can balance an egg on its end on those two special days of the year.

An egg blanced on the Equinox -- can be balanced off the Equinox too.

Turns out, nothing special about those two days either — especially regarding the moon. Look it up on Snopes if you don’t believe me — or you could look in any middle school Earth Science textbook, but what fun would that be?

Or you could try it yourself. Balance an egg on, say, September 25 instead of September 22.

But first, you have to stop believing you can’t, which could be harder than balancing an egg on the head of a pin, let alone a kitchen table.

I am fascinated at how belief trumps science at every turn. I also believed I couldn’t live without the affection of that most gorgeous boy in the Universe who sat down in front of me in Creative Writing class. But experience has shown that it’s this completely different guy I met years later who I would choose to live my life with, not because I couldn’t live without his affection, but because I wouldn’t want to. But I digress . . .

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